Did you know, that hand sanitizers are the devil? That’s right. First off, some sanitizers claim to kill 99.99% germs. However, did you know that some of those germs on your hands are actually friendly? These beneficial germs eat other germs to help keep you healthy. Which means these sanitizers weakens your immune system, both by killing these friendly germs and by not allowing your body to be naturally exposed to others.
Additionally, if these sanitizers only kill 99.99% of germs, that means there’s a 0.01% population which is not killed, and is allowed to grow and grow because they are immune to the hand sanitizers. Which means stronger sanitizers will need to be invented to kill them, and there’ll be a new 0.01% that’ll exist, which will need a stronger sanitizer to kill them. This back and forth will continue, creating super germs. Which means you may be dooming your great-great-great-grandkids to a death by the common cold, because of how we have influenced germs to adapt.
(Also, as a friend of mine pointed out, if hand sanitizers only kill germs, that means you now have dead germs on your hands, which will never leave unless you wash them, making the purpose of hand sanitizers pointless.)
Hand sanitizers can also cause dry skin, strip away natural oils, and maybe even create alcohol addictions. (Since alcohol is present in many sanitizers and can be absorbed by the skin. This could explain why so many use hand sanitizes so often. That, or they have a phobia, or are victims to the Pavlov effect, and have been conditioned to want to use hand sanitizers whenever they see a bottle. Similar to the instant thirst that the sight of a water fountain can create.)
Now, how many of these facts are true? I don’t know. I haven’t done the research. Though these “facts” sound very logical in my head, I don’t know how many of them are true or how many have been fabricated. I mean, hospitals encourage the use of hand sanitizers, so they can’t be that bad, right?
So, I just revealed that I’m not an expert on hand sanitizers, so where did these “facts” come from?
The answer to that, is Little Prarie Bible Camp, or LPBC as the cool kids call it.
LPBC is a special place located not too far away from Rolla, MO., down a country road. It used to actually be a little prairie; however, thanks to the hard work of many dedicated volunteers who came together to hand plant pine trees, the camp doesn’t look like a little prairie anymore, and is blessed with shade. LPBC is a summertime highlight for many. A place of worship, Bible study, laughter, fun, and good food. And a place filled with many memories. Such as me thinking of reasons why not to have my hands sprayed with Germ-X, by the girl holding a bottle of the stuff at the entrance to the lunchroom.
Hopefully, we all have a special place in our lives. A place that makes us smile anytime we get to visit. A place that we can share with others. And a place that can give us a slice of home, that is, until we get to see our true home!
Now, just in case if you’re wondering, I do use soap. And I haven’t made any protest signs or started a cult to attack hand sanitizer companies. I’m not that crazy . . . hopefully.
I do choose not to use hand sanitizers. Though, I don’t know if it’s because of fun, health concerns, or to keep me from now becoming a hypocrite. It’s funny how much LPBC has impacted me. Not only in my view of sanitizers, but it has also been a huge impact on my faith, and it’s even one of the biggest reasons why I made the move to Rolla after graduation. Though the place isn’t what’s most important. It’s the people, who make it a very special place to visit.
If you want to know more about Little Prarie, check out their website,
Disclaimer: This blog is a work of satire, and is not a factual argument against the use of hand sanitizers.